A woman hired a contractor to repaint the interior of her house. The woman walked the man through the second floor of her home and told him what colors she wanted for each room. As they walked through ...

A blond woman named Babbette finds herself in dire trouble.
Her business has gone bust and she's in serious financial trouble.
She's so desperate that she decides to ask God for help. She
begins ...

Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Desktop."
Customer: "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click ...

Santa Claus, like all pilots, gets regular visits from the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA). It was shortly before Christmas when the FAA examiner arrived.
In preparation, Santa had the ...

Widow Invites Four Nice Young Men To Dinner
There was an elderly southern widow who lived in a large mansion. She was feeling generous when it came to Thanksgiving, so she called up the local ...

Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious-looking bear. The first lawyer immediately opened his briefcase, pulled out a pair of sneakers and started putting them on.The second lawyer looked ...

An old cowhand came riding into town on a hot, dry, dusty day. The local sheriff watched from his chair in front of the saloon as the cowboy wearily dismounted and tied his horse to the rail a few feet ...

*** Why Pumpkins Are Better Than Men ***
Every year you get a brand new crop to choose from.
No matter what your mood, pumpkins are always ready to greet you with a smile.
...

Microsoft Corporation has taken another step toward dominating
every aspect of American life with the introduction of
Contraceptive 98, a suite of applications designed for users who
engage ...

This guy who works at a pickle factory comes home and hands his wife 50 dollars. She asked him what it was from and he told her that he won it in a bet -- the guys at the factory bet him 50 dollars ...

If you and I were squirrels, I could bust a nut in your hole.
How do you like your eggs: fried, scrambled or fertilized?
My love for you is like diarrhea I just can't hold it in.
...

The room was full of pregnant women and their partners,
and the Lamaze class was in full swing. The instructor
was teaching the women how to breathe properly, along
with informing the men ...

Two law partners leave their office and go to lunch. In the middle of lunch the junior partner slaps his forehead.
"Damn," he says. "I forgot to lock the office safe before we left."
His ...

A nursery school teacher says to her class, "Who can use the word 'definitely' in a sentence?"
First a little girl says, "The sky is definitely blue."
The teacher says, "Sorry, Amy, ...

What those bra size 'letters' mean ...
A for Almost there
B for Barely boobs
C for Can live with these
D for Damn good
E for Enormous
F for FAKE!